My Life With You
by KrystleHeartbreaker
Summary: Alexander s and John s life from their child hood to their 30 s. What happened during their childhood to what how they met and fell in love. Lams, Marliza, Mulette , jeffmads, ect
1. Chapter 1

**Authors note**

 **Hey guys , this is my first fan fiction and im using some of the actual information from the actual thing. Um so what im planning to do is start from their childhood and go until their 30´s or more. I will try to post every Tuesday or Friday. And if I can everyday since i dont have school right now. This is going to be multi-chapter thing and its going to be long. This is going to mention blood, abuse, killing, and other things so just a heads up .Hope you enjoy.**

Chapter one

Alex POV

¨MOM, IM HOME!¨ I yelled with excitement. Today we finally got our new teacher. Sure we only got math twice a week, but still it was exciting. And on top of all my eleventh birthday wasn't that far away.¨MOM! WHERE ARE YOU!¨ I know my mom works nearly all day, but by now she would be here for a while before she left.

¨Why?¨ I heard someone silently sobbing.

¨Mom, are you- MOM!¨She was on the floor crying , with a black eye, bloody lip, and a lot of bruises on her arms. She looked up at me startled,her eyes looked like she had been crying for a while.¨Mom what happened?¨

¨Alexander please sit d-down.¨ I shivered. She only calls me Alexander when im in trouble or something bad happened.¨Look ,me and your father g-got into a fight and well, he-he .¨I was starting to get very scared . The way she was talking. So coldly, so sad. And whenever she says Alexander or Father Its never a good sign.¨Alexander, your Father left.¨

I couldn´t move. I was in shock.

¨What?Why?¨I asked I started crying as well. Did i do something wrong. Did he not love us ?

¨Alexander, your older brother is your half-brother. A long time ago before i met your father i was married and had James. I was accused of adultery. But nothing ever happened . And he abused me . He was never a good husband and said that if i said anything he would kill my family and our son. I remained quiet until the day he said that he wanted the divorce. I said yes, and even though I knew James could never meet his father , at least we would be safe. The day before the divorce he accused me of adultery. I had to run away with James and thats when i met your father. I married him and told him that I adopted James. He accepted that and we got married. Then we had you. He was pleased and I didn't want to ruin that. I never told him anything and I have kept this journal were i would write everything . I wrote down what happened and i think he found the journal and read what happened. I think he felt betrayed . Before you arrived he told me that he knows . He had his bags and told me how i could have done something so bad and not told him. He hit me and told me that i could keep both my mistakes . And then he left. I am so sorry sweetheart. I hope that you can forgive me.¨

I felt hurt, angry, betrayed, but most of all confused.

¨Its OK. I forgive you mom.¨I couldn't believe this. My life felt like it was all just a lie.

Once James arrived, my mom told him everything. He just as crushed as i was.

After that, i didn't talk, eat, or smile a lot. It was a rare thing. Write. Read. It will help the pain. I buried myself in work. It continued like that ever since, until that day.

John´s POV

¨I got to get better hair ties. This is the third time this whole day that my hair got lose.¨I said to myself. Today was a good, except for the part of my hair getting lose during gym, and writing.

I wonder what my sister is doing

Me and her always play with her barbies and baby dolls. Father doesn't like it though. Last time he caught us we got yelled at and he hit me. Its still clear as glass.

¨ _The baby is crying. Can you get her something to eat.¨I yelled while holding a plastic baby in my arms._

 _¨Sure, be right there, just let me finish making the soup.¨My little sister Martha was making chicken soup._

 _¨WHAT IS THE MEANING OF PUT THAT DOLL DOWN THIS INSTANT OR ELSE. MARTHA I CANT BELIEVE THAT YOU ARE LETTING HIM PLAY WITH GIRL TOYS!¨_

 _¨But-but father, I just wanted to-¨ I stuttered._

 _¨DONT TALK BACK TO ME CHILD.¨ And then he hit me in my arm. I still have the bruise._

 _¨JOHN! Sweetheart are you ok?¨I was crying and she holding me and looking at my bruise._

 _¨Martha dont baby him. He has to man up and he better stop playing with those girl toys. If I ever see you playing with them ever again you are going to-¨_

 _¨HENRY LAURENS DONT YOU DARE LAY A HAND ON HIM YOU GOT THAT!¨_

 _¨SHUT UP WOMEN!¨And then he slaped her._

It was terrible. Ever since that day me and my sister bring a few of my toys over to her room to make it seem like if I was playing with my toys and not hers.

I guess I was day dreaming for a while because when I got back to reality, I was already home. Once I opened the door, I wished that i hadn't because it was terrible. My mother was on the floor with blood on her face. Martha was trying to get her to wake up, she was crying so bad. Henry Jr just stood there crying in a ball. He was only four but apparently knew what was happening. And lastly their was my father. He was angry, no worst than angry. He looked like if he was about to kill my mother. No, like he was about to kill Henry, Martha, and my mother.

Then he saw me.

And before I knew it I was also on the ground. I dont know who was over me. Everything was just a big, giant blur. I closed my eyes, and when i woke up i was in a hospital room. Martha next to my bed and mom in another bed with Henry sleeping next to her.

¨Martha. Wake up sis.¨ I said quietly so that Henry and mom didn't wake up.

¨JACKY. YOUR AWAKE.¨So much for trying not to wake anyone up.

¨What happened?¨Henry asked

¨Jacky. Sweetheart are you OK?¨My mom asked softly.

¨Yeah, OK. What about you mom?¨

¨Im OK.¨

¨What happened? How long have I been here¨

¨You've been here for two days.¨ Answered Martha.

¨Me and your father got into a fight. I told him that it should be okay that you play with your sister´s toys. He said that it was not acceptable and then he hit me. I passed out and when i woke up i saw you laying on the floor. I guess that he got mad that i was telling him to let one of his sons play with girl dolls and let the rest of his anger out with you. Im sorry.¨

¨Its okay mom. Thanks for trying. But wont dad go to jail for this?¨

¨No. He paid the doctors to just take care of us not say a thing about what happened.¨

¨Oh. Okay.¨

It was so unfair. Why would he do this to us. Why did i have this father. He was racist, sexist, homophobic, abusive, and way to many others to list. He was the worst father ever.

My mother on the other hand was the best. She accepted everyone and was so sweet. Everytime my father would start to yell at one of us she would tell him to stop. He only listen when it was for Henry Jr or Martha, but for me, he would hit her or me.

 **And the worst part was that we still had to deal with him.**

 **Thank you so much for reading. For me this was kind of short, at least for me but it was OK i guess. Their wont be Lams for a while and let me get a few things straight about the characters. Their age and sexuality.**

 **John Laurens- 11 years old. Gay**

 **Martha Laurens- 9 years old. Bi**

 **Henry Jr Laurens- 4 years old. Straight**

 **Eleanor Laurens- 30 years old. Straight**

 **Henry Laurens- 32 years old. Straight**

 **Alexander Hamilton-10 years old. Bi**

 **Rachel Hamilton-29 years old. Straight**

 **James Jr Hamilton- 13 years old. Straight**

 **James Hamilton- 33 years old. Straight**


	2. Chapter 2

**Sorry guys. I just figured out how to post chapters and I kind of got grounded so yeah. I'm posting this Tuesday and I'm making it a bit longer.**

 **Also I'm still doing that chapter. And right now I'm still crying from how sad it is. Please don't hate me bye.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Authors note**

 **Sorry for the delay. I was going to post this 2 weeks ago but got stuck planning my baby cousins baptism. I also got grounded and when i got ungrounded I didn't know how to post a chapter. But finally chapter two. And since im going to school this Monday its going to be harder to post chapters. So sorry**

 **TRIGGER WARNING- ABUSE, MURDER, AND MANY TEARS FROM ALL OF US. MAYBE**

 **Enjoy.**

 _3rd person POV- Alex-_

It had been nearly two years since James Hamilton had left Alexander, James Jr, and Rachel to fend for themselves.

After James left, somehow, it got out what Rachel did. Because of that, she nearly got fired, and got payed she didn't get another job, she wouldn't be able to afford food, clothing, or even paying the worked day and night and barely ate so that James and Alex had enough to eat.

Alexander, even though his mother gave him most of her food, he didn't eat much. He read and wrote nonstop to forget the pain. He looked pale and thin. He didn't sleep much as well.

James on the other hand took it a bit better than anyone else. He started working small jobs to get money in case of emergencies. Nobody knew that he was working, because if his mother found out, he would be in trouble and have to quit.

And when everything seemed to get better , their luck quickly turned around.

¨Hey guys, im- MOM! ALEX! ARE YOU OKAY, WHAT HAPPENED?¨James came home to find Alex unconscious in their mother´s arms while she was shivering and coughing violently.

¨James- _cough, cough_ \- I dont feel well.¨And then she fainted.

¨Mom. Wake up. You guys are burning up.¨He then brought them to their bed. ¨Ill go call a doctor. I hope that one of them will actually help them.¨

 _2 hours later._

¨How are they? Are they breathing are they going to survive this? Do you know whats causing this? James asked the doctor. He had been able to find one, but he had to pay double the regular price

¨They both have scarlet fever and the possibilities of them surviving is less than thirty percent. They haven't been feeding themselves properly, have they?¨The doctor said.

¨I dont know.¨

¨Well if they dont do that know, the possibilities of surviving drops by ten percent.¨

James eyes started to burn. He already lost his father. He didnt want to lose his brother and mother either.

¨Okay how much will it be?¨

¨Twenty dollars each.¨

¨Okay.¨Thankfully he got paid twenty dollars per day, so it was okay.¨Thank you for your service.¨

¨My pleasure.¨And with that the doctor left.

¨I promise Ill take care of you.¨James whispered as he sat in a near by chair. ¨I promise.¨

 _3 weeks later_

It had been nearly three weeks since Alex and Rachel had been diagnosed with Scarlet fever. Alexander had been getting better, but their mother hadnt. James recently found out that she had been giving Alex most of her food : but when the found out, it was too late.

¨Mom why?¨Alex asked. He was already able to move around a bit, but right now, he was lying next to his mother.

¨I would give my life for both of you.¨She said weakly.

¨Save your strength and stay alive. Please we need you.¨James said. He was too focus on his mother to notice on his mother that he didnt notice that he was crying.

¨I dont think im going to make it. I already feel my soul leaving my body.¨

¨Mom, please dont leave us.¨Alex was crying, while his mother was holding him.

¨I want you both to promise me something.¨

¨- _sniff-_ Yeah?¨James asked while holding her hand.

¨Promise me that no matter what, you'll be their for each other.¨

¨We promise.¨They said in union.

¨I love you so much.¨She said with her final breathe.

¨Mom? MOM! PLEASE WAKE UP!¨Alex screamed. More tears started streaming down their faces.

* * *

¨What are we going to do?We dont have enough have money to pay the bills or get food.¨James said. It had been over a week since their mother died. James had to quit school to get more money. He now got thirty-five dollars per day.

¨Maybe I could quit school as well to help a bit.¨Alex suggested.

¨What? No, Alex you love school.¨

¨But I feel like im not helping.¨

¨Alex, the world needs your top notch brain. We will find another way. You dont need to quit school.¨

¨Okay. Hmm. Oh! I got an idea!¨Alex stood up with excitement.

¨Yeah?¨

¨You remember how mom always kept a book with family contact information?¨

¨Yeah, the one in the living room?¨

¨Yes. We can call family members to see if we can go live with them.¨

¨Thats a great idea! Lets go do that right now.¨And with that they hurried to the living room and called.

They called ten different people until-

¨Hello?¨The man in the other end said.

¨Hello. This is James Jr Hamilton and Alexander Hamilton. We are looking for our uncle, Rachel´s brother.¨

¨Oh. Im her brother. Is something wrong with her? ¨

¨She-she died a week ago.¨Alex said.

¨What? How? Where is your father?¨

¨Our father left two years ago.¨James said.

¨And she died of scarlet fever trying to get enough money for the bills and food¨Alex continued.

¨I see. Are you guys okay?¨

¨No, we dont have enough money to pay bills or buy food. We were wondering if we could move in with you?¨Alex was hoping he say yes.

 _3rd person POV- John-_

¨Happy Birthday, Jacky!¨Everyone said in union, except for Henry Laurens. He was in a meeting in Texas, but it was during the week of John´s birthday.

¨Thanks guys!¨Said John happily. _Im just glad that that monster isnt here_ thought John.

¨Blow the candles, John.¨Said Henry Jr.

¨MAKE A WISH!¨Shouted Martha.

John thought for a second. _What do I want? For me, mom, and the kids to be away and safe from that monster._ And then he blew the candles.

¨YAY!¨All the kids yelled in union.

¨Alright, everyone downstairs for cake!¨ Announced their mother.

¨WACE YOU DOWN WERE!¨Yelled Mary.

¨CAREFUL!¨Yelled James as he chased after Mary.

 **James is John´s brother who was staying with their grandparents. He is 10 years old. Mary was born after Henry beat them up last time.**

Now it was just John and his mother.

¨Do you want to tell him.¨Said his mother. When John was ten, he told his mother that he was gay. She accepted it, but he hadnt told his father.

His father was one of the most homophobic and abusive people he knew. If he found out, it would not be pretty.

¨No, I dont think im ready.¨John said as he looked down.

¨Alright, but remember, no matter what, im here for you. I love you.¨She said softly as she hugged him.¨Come on, lets go downstairs. I have a surprise for you.¨

¨Okay mom. Lets go before the kids eat all the cake and leave us the tray.¨joked John.

* * *

¨ALRIGHT EVERYONE! GET IN POSITION! QUICK, BEFORE THEY COME!¨Yelled Martha. Their house was very big, so they probably didnt hear them.

¨WEADY!¨Yelled Mary.

¨READY!¨said James and Henry Jr in union.

¨Good.¨Said Martha as she got herself into position.

They were all in the living room. The couches were moved to the side, next to the TV. Martha and James were holding a _We Love You Big Bro_ sign, while Henry Jr and Mary were holding presents. As they walked in, Mary and Henry Jr went to give him the presents while Martha and James yelled-

¨HAPPY BIRTHDAY JACKY. CHEERS TO ANOTHER YEAR AND FOR MANY MORE TO COME!¨

¨Thank you so much.¨John said. He was on the verge of tears. ¨I can´t believe you did all of this. Honestly, I thought that you were going to eat the cake.¨He continued joking.

¨Trust much.¨Said Martha as she went to hug him. ¨I mean, we at least save you guys a piece.¨

¨Sure.¨Said John in a sarcastic tone.

¨Whatever ya big dork.¨She said as she stuck her tongue out

 _One day later._

Everyone was sitting in the living room. John was drawing turtles, Martha and James were reading a Spanish book, Henry Jr and Mary were playing with their toys, and their mother was watching the news. It was peaceful for once in the Laurens household. John then stopped drawing and thought for a second.

¨Hey mom, can i talk to you?¨He asked.

¨Sure. What is it?¨Asked his mother.

¨But in private, please.¨

¨Sure, lets go.¨They went to the kitchen, which was next to the living room. They checked on the kids one last time. ¨Okay whats going on sweetheart?¨

¨Mom. Ive been thinking, maybe I should tell Martha that im gay, but what if-¨

¨YOU'RE WHAT!?¨Yelled Henry.

¨F-father! W-what are y-you doing here ?!¨John stuttered. He was so scared. His father, the most homophobic, abusive person that John knew, just found out that one of his sons was gay.

¨The meeting was delayed for a few weeks. So i come home to find out that my SON was GAY!¨He yelled. John could already feel the pain of his father hitting him into a pulp.

¨Father please, dont hurt me.¨John whimpered as tears streamed down his face.

¨DONT TALK TO ME, YOU DISGUSTING FIGURE OF A SON!¨He then started making his hand into a fist.

 _John´s POV-_

I couldnt move. I just saw him making his hand into a fist.

¨YOU DESERVE THIS!¨He yelled. Then he slammed me against the kitchen counter. My head hit the edge of the counter, hard. I felt a warm liquid trickle down my head. I touched it. _Blood_. _Oh no._

JOHN! ARE YOU OKAY?!¨Mom said as she ran over to me.

¨Mom.¨I said weakly. I was scared, and I was losing my vision very slowly. Then I saw my father grabbing the vase, and threw it at me.¨MOM!¨I yelled as she got in the way. Her head hit the vase.

I lost my vision, and when i got it back, I saw my mom on the floor. Blood on her face and arms.

She lifted her head up and said¨Jacky, I love you. Take care of the kids.¨She set her head back down.

¨I love you too, mom.¨ I said weakly. Then, everything went dark.

 _3rd person POV-John-_

What happened?¨John asked as he woke up.

¨Jacky, You´re alive!¨Said Martha as she hugged him with tears in her eyes.

¨Where´s mom?¨ John asked as Martha got off him. John noticed that she was wearing all black, and her eyes were red, like she had been crying.

¨John, f-father killed-¨Martha tried to say before she broke down to tears.

¨No.¨John whispered.¨This is all my fault.¨He said a bit louder.

¨What are you talking about? You didnt do this.¨

¨Martha do you know why he even attacked us?¨

She shook her head.

¨Three years ago, I told mom that i was gay- ¨

¨You´re gay?¨

¨Yeah, and you know how much father hates people who like the same gender.¨John felt ashamed of himself.

¨Yeah, I understand why you didnt tell father. Nobody knows this, but im bi.¨She said proudly.

¨You are?¨John was shocked. Part of John was happy that he wasnt the only one in the family who liked the same gender. But the other part of him was scared. What would happen to Martha if father knew.

¨Yeah. That´ll be out lil´ secret.¨ She hugged him again.¨But tell me, what exactly happened?¨

¨Three years ago, i told mom that I was gay. She accepted me and didnt tell father. She was supportive and encouranged me to tell father. I told her that I wasnt ready everytime, and she didnt push it. After my birthday, when I wanted to tell mom, it was to tell her that i was telling you , but then he stepped in and heard when i told mother. You know the rest.¨After he finished he started sobbing uncontrollably.

¨John, its okay.¨Martha reassured him.

¨Its not okay, this is all my fault.¨He said in between his cries.

¨John its not your fault that your gay. Its also not your fault that that monster killed our sweet mother.¨

 _Jacky, I love you. Take care of the kids._

Those words rang in his head over and over.

¨I have to be strong. Im not going to let him hurt the kids.¨John thought o himself as he wiped away the tears.

¨Martha , I would like to have talk with your brother.¨Henry had entered the room. When he looked at John, his expression turned into an anger and disgust one.

¨Yes father.¨She hugged John and whispered ¨He blacked mailed the police and the doctors. Be careful.¨

John couldnt believe his ears. The police werent doing anything about the situation. He killed a person. John tried to remind himself to be brave and strong, but he felt scared and weak.

 **YES I FINISHED CHAPTER TWO. GUYS ITS 12:40 AM. I am really tired but it was worth it. Sorryis there are a lot of mistakes but i just stayed up til midnight to write this for you. Also im doing the hamitlon 30 days challenge.**

 **Question one- Favorite Character?**

 **Answer- John laurens. He is my cinnamon roll**

 **Hope you enjoyed and bye**


	4. Chapter 4

**TRIGGER WARNING- DEATH AND ATTEMPTS OF SUICIDE AND A REALLY SHORT CHAPTER**

 **Enjoy**

 _Alex POV_

I was not going to let go no matter what James said. It was a do or die situation for James, the last family member I had.

¨ALEX PLEASE LET GO, SAVE YOUR SELF.¨he yelled. I could see the panic in his eyes. ¨Please just let go.¨he said more quietly. Curse this hurricane. Curse my life. First my father then my mother. Now my uncle, aunt, cousins, grandparents and now James? There was no way.

¨I AM NOT LETTING GO! DONT YOU REMEMBER WHAT MOM SAID!? REMEMBER HOW 5 YEARS AGO, BEFORE SHE DIED SHE SAID TO PROTECT EACH OTHER!?¨ I yelled. He was starting to slip out of my grip.

¨AND THAT IS EXACTLY WHY YOU NEED TO LET GO!¨ he responded.

¨JAMES YOU COULD FALL TO YOUR DOOM. YOU COULD DIE FROM DROWNING OR-¨

¨ALEX PLEASE, I PROMISE ILL BE OKAY.¨

Then everything went black

 _Johns POV_

Here we were again. In the grave of my mother. It was a dark day. Heck, since she left every day has been a dark day.

¨John.¨Said Martha.¨Father wishses to speak with us.¨

¨ill be there in a a while.¨I responded.

¨He said he wishes to speak with us now.¨

¨Oh, okay lets go.¨I followed her to the entrance of the grave yard.

¨John, Martha.¨ Henry Laurens said when he saw them.

¨Father, what did you want to talk about? ¨ John asked.

¨You and your brothers and sister will go live in England with your grandfather and grandmother. Maybe like that you can straighten up and your brothers and sisters wont have that disgusting, problem¨ He said without any emotion.

¨What?¨I barely managed

¨But-but father -¨

¨The decision is final.¨ and then Henry left us

¨This is all my fault.¨I quietly, but loud enough for Martha to hear.

¨Jacky-¨She said before i ran away with tears in my eyes.

 _2 weeks later_

We were at the airport, we were about to leave, for who knows how long.

 **Authors note.**

 **So sorry I just started school and its been real hard to get time off. But guess what i can probably get into the gifted and talented program.**

 **Its basically taking advance classes , but i have to take a few tests to actually see if i qualify for the classes. I really hope so. Also im changing my schedule for once or twice a month. so yeah. Please dont kill me**

 **Question- Least favorite character?**

 **Answer- GEORGE FREAKING EACKER .He killed Philip my cinnamon roll 2**


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